So, I know it’s been a while since I posted.  However, I have been really trying not to dwell on the baby-making.  I feel so much better this time around and I feel like it is because of a combination of things:

  • Not planning so much – I came to the realization that last time we had a transfer, leading up to it I was saying no to things I should’ve said yes to.  And I was looking at the calendar like “Oh, I’ll still be in my first trimester then, so I should plan on traveling,” or “That wedding will be right around the due date…”  After the last try I thought that I’ve kind of stopped living my life.  This time I feel much more balanced in doing everything I can to give us our best chance at getting pregnant but not becoming obsessed.
  • Exercise – While on birth control and lupron I made sure that I was swimming at least 3 mornings every week and taking a long walk on Sundays.  This really did help me find my sense of normalcy and calm.
  • Acupuncture- I LOVE ACUPUNCTURE!  I was definitely in a slump and feeling depressed and just not me from like January to the middle of February.  After I had my first acupuncture treatment, I felt amazing.  My motivation came back and I felt way more energetic.  Plus, there is actual scientific proof that acupuncture helps your chances getting pregnant – so that makes me feel really good about it as well.  Although, I may want to continue in the future!
  • Progesterone in oil – This time around, I mentioned to my IVF coordinator nurse that I’d like to try the shots instead of the suppositories so that I can keep swimming.  She laughed a little at my reasoning but whatever lady, you don’t know me! LOL.  I can’t run because of a back condition and I have just found a new love – swimming.  If I’m going to be on progesterone for 9-10 weeks, I’d rather it be a shot so I can continue to exercise!
  • No surprises – This time we know exactly what to expect and that really helps more than you would think!  It just seemed that there was procedures that we required that were sprung on us at the last minute, or medicine we weren’t sure how to order, or medicine schedules I was afraid I would mess up.  This time I felt like I had it all under control and felt good not to be stressing about that one more thing.

And now we are in the  2ww and it is feeling like time is in slow motion.  I thought I would be afraid to assume I am pregnant because I know how it feels to then be let down. But, I’m enjoying being pregnant until proven otherwise.  No one really knows about our transfer except for family so that is also kind of nice.

I can’t be cautiously optimistic.  I’m either all in or not and right now, I’m all in.  This time just feels so much different.  I haven’t really had any symptoms (today is only 4dp5dt) except for a pinching/side sticker type pain in the left side of my uterus that happened all day on and off on 2dp5dt and a little bit this morning.  Its a feeling I did not feel last time at all.  I’ve then had some light cramping but sometimes I think it’s just gas 😛 I haven’t had not even the tiniest bit of spotting which worries me but I’m trying not to dwell.

We will find out soon enough!

♥, Elle


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